Friday, March 5, 2010

I Love Being "Mom"

From the time I can remember, I have always wanted to be a mom.  I played with babies and barbies for hours on end.  I was always the grown up, and I always, always had babies.

That yearning never stopped.  As I became a young adult, I decided I wanted to be a Teacher.  That career choice, for various reasons, did not happen.  I ended up falling into Marketing and Sales, which I enjoy.  But, through it all, I wanted to be a mom.

Hubby and I were very blessed in that having children was never an issue for us.  And within a short time, our family of two grew to robust, happy family of five.

I have enjoyed my children beyond measure.  And I love sharing their stories, my joys and tears and our every day life with friends, family and here, on my blog/diary.  I try to infuse humor wherever I can.  Because I feel humor warms the soul.

I am always frank, candid and honest with my children.  I try to treat them as much like "adults" as is appropriate at the time.  I love to be silly and funny with them.  And they have grown up realizing that sarcasm can usually fight through even the most ugly of childhood meanness.

I have always felt like my job for this life is to prepare my children to be happy, well-rounded and productive members of society.  God has great plans for them.  And my job is to get them ready for them.

However strong and convicted I feel about everything I've written above, there are certainly moments of doubt.  Did I say the right thing?  Did I do the right thing?  Last night was one of those moments that gave me pause.

Emma and I were finishing up her homework together.  She yawned and stretched and murmured, "I have a headache," while rubbing her temples.

I looked at her through my own very sleepy eyes and confessed, "I do, too."

She looked up at me without missing a beat and said, "You always have a headache.  You have kids."

The humorist in me was is stitches.  I immediately tweeted and Facebooked her fantastically funny quip, and called my parents to share what an immensely funny grandchild they had.

Then... this morning I woke up, and her words were ringing in my ears.  But they were no longer funny. Instead, they were haunting me.

Is that what she thinks parenthood is about?  Having one long, continuous headache?  My heart ached and tears sprung to my eyes.  I wanted to run to her and say, "Oh no!  You have it so wrong!  Motherhood is a blessing, a joy, the very best thing that has ever happened to me in my life!  YOU are the reason God put me here!"

But I managed to reign in my inner drama queen and go about my day without accosting her with drippy, sappy words of love and devotion.  Instead, I will will try to infuse everything a little at a time, like I do the rest of my "teaching" and "love."

And I will try to show her that parenting is more than just headaches...  It's also backaches, sore muscles and all sorts of other problems....  Yeah, I just couldn't help it....

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