Monday, September 1, 2008

Over the Line

Today proved to be the day that was just over the line. The kids and I had gone to Illinois with BFF and her kids. Hubby went to S.C. for a car show (I'm not kidding). And we were going on approximately hour number 125 of being with the kids 24 hours a day.

BFF is so easy-going with her kids. I sound like a drill sergeant compared to her soft, polite urging or her oh-so-enthusiastic pep talks. Her kids seem to always look at me like, "Wow, she's crazy."

While in the car on the road from Illinois to Tennessee the kids did a fairly good job of entertaining themselves. However, none had enough sleep over the weekend. And all were at the point of being around each other just a little too much. Keith was barking at the kids to try to get them to do whatever he wanted them to do. Emma sat quietly in the back, only once saying that she really would like for Hannah to quit imitating her. Amy sang along to every song that she knew. Hannah sang and watched Emma carefully out of the corner of her eye. And Thomas played his video game non-stop, much to BFF's chagrin.

A small-scale war broke out over a box of Chocolate Peanut Butter Corn Pops. Okay- first of all, ewwww. C&PB Corn Pops??? Seriously??? Certainly this fits nowhere into the food pyramid- unless things have changed A LOT since I studied it. Secondly, the kids had no rules what-so-ever when it came to food since they had been at BFF's mom's house, and Grammie refused to let her grandbabies (or their friends) have a mili-second of unhappiness. So, for anyone to dictate the eating habits of another was futile and unwarranted.

"Mooooooooom," Amy sang in her best tattle-tale voice. "Keith won't let me have the Chocolate Peanut Butter cereal stuuuuuuuffffff..."

I was driving the car, and could not turn around to give Keith the hairy eyeball. He was directly behind me and trying desperately to ignore me.

I grabbed a Cheez-it from my stash and winged it over my back shoulder. Keith yelped.

"What was that for?" he asked, offended.

"GIVE AMY THE CEREAL NOW!" I demanded, tired and aggravated to have to moderate yet another stupid argument.

"But, we're just about to eat dinner," he protested.


"No, ma'am," he mumbled, handing over said cereal.

I growled and grumbled some more as BFF snickered.

"Stop laughing," I warned. "Or I'll throw a Cheez-it at you, too."

Now she laughed out loud.

"Okay, fine," I groused. "Next time YOU can be the warden."

"No," she replied cheerfully, "You seem to have it all under control."

Realizing the delicate balance of loving mom and OCD crazy person, I addressed Keith:

"Honey, I appreciate your trying to help. But really, I have it. 'Kay?"

"Yes, ma'am," came the forced reply from behind me.

I sighed. Maybe tomorrow will be better- after we all get some rest, I thought as I pinched the bridge of my nose.

BFF turned and looked at Hannah & Thomas.

"You two need to quit eating now. We're going to have dinner soon."

Keith sighed, exasperated, behind me.

"Thanks," I hissed under my breath at BFF.

"No problem," she replied cheerfully, as she smiled like the cat who just ate the canary.

"Hey, Hannah, Thomas?" I called behind me.

"Yes?" they responded.

"Let's call Grammie and tell her that Mommy is breaking the rule of 'no food rule'."

BFF turned and looked at me, eyes narrowed.

"You wouldn't," she challenged.

"Okay!" Hannah & Thomas called out happily.

It was my turn to look to her and smile smugly.

"Oh, my bad," I said, very insincerely.

"Okay- EVERYONE- let's put up the food for right now. We'll eat dinner in about 3o minutes," she called, still glaring at me.

She was met with a mixture of groans and mumbles. But the cereal got put away.

I smiled as I drove, watching the road.

BFF glared at me some more, then threw a Cheez-it at me.

"Hey!" I yelped. "What's that for?"

"You cheated," she pouted. "I'm supposed to be the good mommy."

"Huh," I retorted. "I think you just wanted them to eat all the cereal so you didn't have to take home that gross stuff."

She smiled up sheepishly. "Yeah, okay. You got me."

"Hey," I said. "Let's 'accidentally' pitch it in the trash when we get to dinner."

"Deal!" she said enthusiastically and smiled.

We were almost home...

1 comment:

ThePrincessMommy said...

You are TOO funny! Out of all of this I bet Emma was soooo glad to have a break from Hannah, "her shadow"!!!! This needs to be in some parenting magazine!!